The Things The Wives Carry

Today is Memorial Day.  Many of us in America will be visiting actual cemeteries to lay flowers and wreaths at the tomb stones of fallen war heroes.  Others are watching our TV as the President and top military leaders commemorate the war dead at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier in Arlington National Cemetery.  Still others are just taking a moment to cast our thoughts and prayers on all those who have died in the service of our country.  On this day that is set aside for fallen soldiers, though, I would like to take a moment in this blog to recognize the contributions of the wives of soldiers in the field.

In 1990, author Tim O Brien (a graduate of the same college I attended - Macalester College), wrote a critically acclaimed book about of platoon of soldiers in Vietnam called; "The Things They Carried". The book talks about the things that soldiers carry on their person, but also in their soul, as they fight in war and combat situations.  The title of this blog is a play on Tim O Brien's title:

The Things the Wives Carry

I should begin by saying that I recognize that today the US military has both men and women in active combat roles, but still, to this day the military is made up of mostly men (24% of US society are male veterans , 2% are female veterans).  Mostly it is still the men who go off to war, and mostly it is still the women who stay at home carry on with their lives and raise families.  And so, I want to focus on:

The Things The Wives Carry

For the past two years I have had the responsibility and the privilege of dropping my daughters off at school nearly every morning and picking them up in the afternoon.  And so, I have gotten to know many of the parents of Haley and Sheena's school mates.  By far my best acquaintances have been the wives of soldiers and sailors whose husbands serve in combat rolls around the world.  Here are a couple of their stories (names have been changed for confidentiality).  Here are some of:

The Things The Wives Carry

Renee
Renee has four kids.  Her husband John is a first lieutenant in the Navy (a graduate of Annapolis).  John is on full time duty away from his family four 5 and 6 months at a time.  John does work in Latin America, usually on secret missions.  Renee joyfully and cheerfully takes care of all four of her kids by herself.  She has a very strong inner constitution and the separation away from her husband for long periods of time is hard for her.  But she recognizes military service as the choice and the life they have chosen as a family.  Sometimes Renee's parents come to help her with the kids, but it mostly falls on her shoulders.  "When is John coming back?" I asked her recently.  "In four months, around Christmas time, but maybe after."  "Is it extremely hard for you?"  "No," she said, confidently, "it's just what we do.  It's better not to think about it."

Jennifer
Jennifer's husband, Frank, is a "Special Operations" Green Beret who serves on secret and very dangerous missions in Afghanistan and Iraq.  One day, recently, just before church began, Frank, who was home on leave, showed me a video on his I-Phone of his base in Kabul that got bombed and obliterated by ISIS militants, just a day after her left the base.  As he showed me the video, Jennifer, his wife stood by his side watching the same images.  "Does this frighten you?"  I asked Jennifer.  "Yes, a lot, I don't like looking at it."  "But," she paused, "Frank is very good at what he does."  There was a quiet resolution and strength with Jennifer which acknowledged the potential for the worst to happen, while at the same time recognized the important professional responsibility that her husband played for our country.

These, of course, are just two stories of wives and mothers whose husbands serve in military situations.  America, as I write, is filled with thousands of wives and mothers who husbands did not come home, and whose families will never see them again.  There are, actually, so many wives of fallen warriors that the US Senate has recently designated April 5 as a day to commemorate, "Gold Star Wives".  Currently, there are over 10,000 members of this non-profit organization (10,000 wives) who are without husbands because of war.

If you know of a family that has been separated war, through service or through life, I encourage you to reach out and connect with them sometime soon.  Find out for yourself:

The Things The Wives Carry

All For Now,

GB











 

Even Jesus Had Scars

When I was first starting Highlands Church, in Paso Robles, our family had a little less means than we do now.  And so, like most young couples starting out, we would tend to try to "fix things" ourselves, rather than hiring people to fix them, or buying new things.  And so, I decided one Saturday afternoon to try to "fix" the box spring on the bottom of an old couch we had in the garage, rather than to buy a new one.  The box spring was extremely heavy and hard to hold, and required that I grip onto it and pull it by great force with a pair of pliers.  Long story short, the box spring slipped out of my hand and popped me in the eye - one millimeter from my eyeball.  My eye was gushing with blood, but by some miracle of God, the spring did not hit the center of my pupil, which would have made me permanently blind.  I rushed to the urgent care, where the doctor skillfully but disapprovingly sewed up the gash just to the side of my eyeball.  "You could have shot your eye out," he said (reminiscent of a line from one of my favorite movies, 'Christmas Story').  To this day I have a three centimeter scar just to the right of my right eye.

When I see my scar in the mirror each morning, it is a reminder to me of how lucky I was that Saturday afternoon.  It is a reinforcement of how fragile all of our human bodies are.  It is a memory of how much I have been through in my relatively short life.  Most of all, my scar is a testament to how God protected me from a near disaster, when, to be honest, I was doing something rather stupid.

Here's my big idea for the morning.

Even Jesus Had Scars

The end of the book of John tells us that on the Sunday of that first Easter, "Jesus came and stood among them and said, 'Peace be with you!' After he said this, he showed them His hands and side (he showed them his scars).  Later, Jesus showed himself and his scars to Thomas who had declared everyone that; Unless I see the nail marks in his hands, and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side (touch Jesus' scars), I will not believe it.  Later Thomas does touch Jesus' scars (the only one in the Bible who we know for a fact ever did), and because of this, believed in Jesus.

Even Jesus Had Scars

This is extraordinary when you think of it.  Why did Jesus have scars?  I mean, after-all, since it was possible for Jesus to reverse the course of life and death itself, to be resurrected, it would seem that it would also have been possible to reverse the exterior clumping-up of white-blood immunity cells which created the masses of skin tissue on his body - to reverse his scars.

What purpose did Jesus' scars serve?  Jesus' scars showed the disciples and the world that Jesus was, in-fact, the same person before the resurrection as he was after the resurrection.  They showed the pain and the struggle that Jesus went through in order to be resurrected.  If Jesus went through pain and survived, then we can too.  They were evidence of Jesus' hardships.  Perhaps, in a strange way, Jesus was almost proud of his scars.  There is evidence of this in the text.  Showing his scars was one of the first things Jesus did after the resurrection.  After saying, "Peace" (Shalom), Jesus showed them his scars.  And why not?  Jesus earned them after all.  They were badges of honor for having vanquished the evil one and overcome death on the cross.

It is impossible to go through this life without a few scars, both on the outside and on the inside of our bodies.

I have a friend who served in Iraq and Afghanistan who suffers from PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder).  Every time he hears a loud bang from a construction site, or the backfire of the exhaust system on an old car, he jumps.  They are a flashback for him of the Buffalo bombs and the explosions that he experienced on a daily basis on the battlefield.  I asked him one day if he thought these startling reminders would ever get better - if his PTSD would ever go away.  He told me with a knowing sense of reality; "Yes, they will get better, but they will never go away."  These PTSD recurrences are his emotional scars.  And he bore them now, every day, with a mixture of fear and pride.

Just after World War I, the so called "War to End All Wars" - and one of the bloodiest and most traumatic in world history, a soldier named Edward Shilito, who fought on the battlefields of Europe and who bore many war wounds and scars, reflected on the scars of Jesus in a poem.  The poem is entitled; "O Jesus of the Scars".  Here it is:

If we have never sought, we seek Thee now;

Thine eyes burn through the dark, our only stars;

We must have sight of thorn-pricks on Thy brow,

We must have Thee, O Jesus of the Scars.

The heavens frighten us; they are too calm;

In all the universe we have no place.

Our wounds are hurting us; where is the balm?

Lord Jesus, by Thy Scars, we claim Thy grace.

If, when the doors are shut, Thou drawest near,

Only reveal those hands, that side of Thine;

We know to-day what wounds are, have no fear,

Show us Thy Scars, we know the countersign.

The other gods were strong; but Thou wast weak;

They rode, but Thou didst stumble to a throne;

But to our wounds only God’s wounds can speak,

And not a god has wounds, but Thou alone.^[1]

Even Jesus Had Scars

And this fact reminds us that we, as people who also have scars, can carry on with faith, love and hope - and because of Christ, overcome all things!

All For Now,

GB

---

^[1] Carson, D. A. (1991). The Gospel according to John (p. 647). Leicester, England; Grand Rapids, MI: Inter-Varsity Press; W.B. Eerdmans.

Don't Ever Give Up On People - Ever

Two truths continue to be reinforced in my life and my ministry.  First, God is good.  Second, most people eventually "come around", no matter how busy, hurt, angry, broken, confused, or against God they initially appear to be.  And so, I have developed a personal motto surrounding this theme:

Don't Ever Give Up On People - Ever

Many years ago, while I was pastor of Highlands Church in Paso Robles, a young man came to church one day who was totally against God and organized religion in general.  I knew that because he told me so at the back door after the service.  "How can you people sleep at night," he said.  I took, "you people" to mean pastors in general.  I knew a little bit about his personal life.  He had recently been divorced.  His father had struggled through addiction to alcohol and other drugs.  His son was now in the custody of his very estranged ex-wife.  He was really angry.  "How can you believe in God when everything in the world will tell you that God doesn't exist," I can remember him telling me as he left church that first and what I assumed to be his last Sunday.  But something inside told me not to give up on him.  And so, I wasn't totally surprised to see him at church the next Sunday.  And the next, and the next.  Each week, his anger seemed to dissipate little by little.  Long story short, he was baptized as a member of the church about a year later.  I can still remember his tattooed neck bowing downward as the water dripped down his shoulders and I prayed over him.

Don't Ever Give Up On People - Ever

Once, also many years ago, I was being interviewed for a job in a church.  The whole committee seemed to really connect with me, and I with them.  One man, though, seemed to have problems with every aspect of my ministry.  He was more theologically conservative than I was and grew up in a Pentecostal tradition.  My longstanding Presbyterian roots seemed to rub him in every wrong direction.  Does God choose us or do we choose God?  Is infant baptism defensible?  Was the world created in 7 days or 70 million years?  Can women serve at the highest levels of ministry?  Can a person be baptized with a sprinkling of water, or does it require full immersion?  We seemed to disagree on almost every subject.  Again, long story short, by some miracle of the Holy Spirit, our differences and disagreements never got in the way of our basic friendship.  We cared for one another, plain and simple.  We have remained in touch for many years now.  I can honestly say that he is one of my best friends.  I would do almost anything for him, and he for me.  On some issues I have become more conservative through the years.  On some issues he has become more open minded.  We have helped each other grow.

Don't Ever Give Up On People - Ever

This past Christmas Eve as we were holding our second worship service of the evening, a family walked through the door of the Spanish Hills Country Club (the venue of our Christmas Eve service last year).  Though this family were very active in the church in the beginning, I had not seen them in over a year and a half.  Frankly, I thought, they have probably begun to attend another church, which was fine, I told myself, as long as they have found somewhere to worship.  And yet, something told me to not give up on them.  So, I called them on the phone on an occasional Saturday and asked if they would like prayers for anything.  I sent them "Mission Blast" emails and newsletters.  When they saw me they beamed with happiness.  They introduced me to their friends, "Let me introduce you to our pastor, Graham Baird".  I was their pastor?  Wow.  They continued, "This is our church, and we are so proud of it."  This was their church?  Incredible.  I'm glad I didn't give up on them.

Don't Ever Give Up On People - Ever

All For Now,

GB

The Last Of The St. Kildans

Sometimes the past reaches out to touch the present.  Sometimes the things that have come before ebb into the things that are happening now.  And sometimes those things die away.

This past month, the last of a beautiful island culture passed away.  The last surviving native resident of the remote Scottish island of St. Kilda has died.  At the age of 93, Rachel Johnson (seen pictured above) the last surviving resident of the island of St. Kilda has gone.  But where is St. Kilda?

On the west coast of Scotland lies a set of islands known as the Hebrides.  I have visited a few of these, and they are very remote.  The wind sweeps in off of the Atlantic ocean with a ferocious vengeance equalled only by the total isolation and loneliness that can be experienced there.  The rain on these islands doesn't just fall from the sky, it slaps you in the face, like a handful of salt on a cold winter day.  The outerrmost islands in this chain are known as the Outer Hebrides.  Of these islands one of the most remote and desolate is an island known as -  St. Kilda.  St. Kilda is where a handful of hearty residents eked out a meager subsistence of fishing, farming and shepherding for thousands of years.

One of these native St. Kildans was named Rachel Johnson.  Rachel grew up in a village where the 36 residents met each morning to decide what the community work projects would be.  Sometimes it was fishing.  Other days it was shepherding, or mending a boat, or a rock wall.  The women would get together to knit a sweater or patch up a quilt blanket.  These sweaters or quilts would be sold to a passing boat of the very occasional tourists who would visit.

For food, Rachel, and her young friends, who were under the age of eight, would be lowered down from the cliff edges in baskets to search for eggs - from puffins, gannets and fumars.  There was no telephone or telegraph machine to the mainland of Scotland.  The only connection to civilization was an ancient tradition of putting a note in a sheep's bladder, and placing it in the ocean, and hoping that the currents would wash the note up on the shore of another remote Hebridean island.  And so, it would sometimes be many months before outsiders heard any news from St. Kilda: "A baby has been born," "a wizened crofter has died," "There are no provisions here, please bring supplies," "a storm destroyed a house."

In 1930, fearing that the local population would be decimated by disease and abject poverty, the National Scottish Trust evacuated all of the residents of St. Kilda (numbering 36), and relocated them to the mainland of Scotland.  Rachel was 8 years old when this happened.  As she grew up, away from her familiar island traditions, she did various things to get by.  She worked as a server at a local hotel in the Ardtornish Highland estate.  She took up highland dancing and won prizes up and down the coast of Scotland.  She eventually married and moved to Clydebank - a town near Glasgow.  Rachel never talked much about her life in St. Kilda.  Indeed, like most island people, she hardly said anything at all.  "If you asked her about St. Kilda now," said her surviving son, Ronnie Gillies, "she would just look at you and smile."

One of the most important aspects of Rachel's life was her faith in God.  She was a stalwart churchgoer.  According to the Church of Scotland, Rachel had been a member of the Radnor Park Parish Church in Clydebank for 60 years.  As the world around Rachel changed, her faith, which was a private one, remained a constant.  Fifty people attended her funeral.  Gaelic hymns, the native language of Scotland, were sung.

Reflecting on his mother's death, Ronnie Gillies, her son said, "It is very sad because she is the last of the line of native St. Kilda residents.  Her death represents the passing of an era."

All For Now,

GB

Screwtape Is 75

I was recently asked by my friend Jim Daly, Head of Focus on the Family in Colorado Springs, to offer some background research on C.S. Lewis' writing of the book, "Screwtape Letters".  Because I did some research on Lewis in Cambridge and Oxford, several years ago, but am far from a Lewis expert, I suppose I was recruited for the task.  This year marks the 75th anniversary of the writing of that important Christian tome.  So, rather that write another blogpost about "Screwtape Letters" this morning, let me simply include Jim Daly's, well-written blog here.  

Also, this thought on this Monday morning.  The evil one (Screwtape's boss) still exists today!  As Lewis so colorfully illustrated in his classic novel, the evil one still loves to divide Christians, cast aspersions, make people feel minimalized and isolated, sow seeds of doubt and fear, divide congregations, lift-up tyrants, bully small people, cause ordinarily sane individuals to lose their minds, enflame hatred, besmirch reputations, create gossip, and worst of all, prevent good people from acting in constructive ways to thwart the forward progression of brokenness in the world.

Also, one addendum to my own research on Lewis.  As you will read in Daly's blog, I said that Lewis had turned on an electric tea kettle in Cambridge.  Turns out I was wrong.  Because Cambridge was so behind the times technologically, they only had gas pipes - and it was a gas tea kettle that Lewis turned on before chapel, not an electric one (which actually makes even more sense as to why it took 20 minutes to heat up the water)!

All For Now,

GB

**

This year marks the 75th anniversary of the publication of one of C.S. Lewis’ most important books, “The Screwtape Letters.”

Have you read it?

In this classic, Lewis re-imagines Hell as a gruesome bureaucracy where a senior demon, Screwtape, corresponds with his nephew and apprentice, Wormwood. The younger spirit’s assignment is to corrupt a newly converted Christian young man living in London during the tumultuous days of World War II. Through the letters, Lewis examines Christian morality, temptation, and good and evil.

“The Screwtape Letters” helped solidify Lewis as one of the most renowned writers of his time. The beloved masterpiece still sells about 150,000 copies every year. Here are three things about this beloved masterpiece you might not know.

1. “The Screwtape Letters” wasn’t originally a book.

The Screwtape Letters were originally released as a weekly series in an Anglican periodical, The Guardian, between May 2, 1941 and Nov. 28. The letters were an instant hit, and they were published as a book in February 1942. It’s been in print ever since.

2. C.S. Lewis refused payment for his original work on “The Screwtape Letters.”

The Guardian was to pay Lewis £2 per letter, but he refused his earnings, asking instead that his earnings go to a fund dedicated to the widows of Church of England clergymen instead.

The gesture was only one example of Lewis’ generosity. He also had a charitable trust set up – The Agape Fund – that anonymously distributed two-thirds of his royalties to help people in need. It’s estimated that 90 percent of Lewis’ income eventually went to charity.

3. Writing “The Screwtape Letters” took its toll on Lewis.

In what might have been his final interview, C.S. Lewis shared he didn’t enjoy writing “The Screwtape Letters.”

“They were dry and gritty going,” he said. “At the time, I was thinking of objections to the Christian life, and decided to put them into the form, ‘That’s what the devil would say.’ But making goods ‘bad’ and bads ‘good’ gets to be fatiguing.”

Moreover, the diabolical nature of the book pushed Lewis into a depression of sorts after writing it. Dr. Robert Banks, a leading scholar of Lewis from Australia said that, “Day after day of having the Devil as an interlocutor took its toll on Lewis.” The subject matter was almost too dark for Lewis to write about and engage with in such an all-encompassing manner.

In the last decade or so there’s been a renewed interest in the writings of Lewis, and rightly so. I was recently asked to share the top ten books I’ve ever read and I included Lewis’ classic, Mere Christianity. It’s had a profound impact on my faith. I’ve been inspired by his many other books and essays and I’ve always been intrigued by stories of his colorful and eccentric personality.

For example, my friend Graham Baird, lead pastor of Mission Street Church in Camarillo, Calif., has studied Lewis for years. He recently shared that when Lewis taught at Magdalen College in Cambridge, he had a unique way of signaling the end of the 20-minute chapel services.

Lewis’ office and rooms were just above the chapel. Before going down to the service, Lewis would set his electric tea kettle – which took about 20 minutes to heat up – and plug it in. That meant if those congregated in the chapel room below heard the loud whistle of Lewis’ kettle, they knew the service was going longer than the allotted time and it was time to wrap up! (But as much time-sensitive as Lewis apparently was for chapel, it should be noted he never missed a service.)

Before I sign off, I want to recommend a new way for you to experience “The Screwtape Letters.” Focus on the Family Radio Theatre recorded the first ever full-cast dramatization of Lewis’ classic. The four-hour production features an award-winning cast, including Andy Serkis (who voiced Gollum in “The Lord of the Rings” film trilogy) as Screwtape.